"The Dynasty Report"
Thoughts from a managerial genius...
Relections on the October 6, 2001 Hoosier Pro Wrestling show and more
My, my, my... this is going to prove to be a TRUE treat for you morons. This is the first column I've written in some time. I simply haven't felt any of you inbreds have deserved a second of my time, but this month... well, this month I need to preach the truth...
The truth is this... I am now the reigning HPW Mid-American Champion, and Psycho... well frankly, Psycho is NOT! Everyone of you pea-brained goofs thought that Psycho would do away me once and for all. This was the first legitimately sanctioned one-on-one encounter in the ring between me and Psycho. Now sure, we've had our shares of confronatations in the past, but nothing like this. But... you were WRONG!
I know, I know... I've heard you all crying. You must be losing sleep at night, knowing your idiotic hero Psycho is no longer champion. You should've been better prepared... I've been telling you for a LONG time that I was going to make sure Pscyho was dethroned... and Dave Dynasty NEVER lies... and, contrary to what you idiots say, I NEVER cheat either.
Sure... you're all asking why Jesse Houston and Johnny Law were at ringside during the match. Well you're in luck... the answer is simple, so even you low-IQ rednecks can understand: they were simply there cheering me on. They were there for moral support... nothing more. If any of you claim otherwise, well... you're WRONG. Must've been a mass hallucination... sorry, it's not my line of work to explain paranormal happenings.
You know... the party to celebrate my win is still going strong. I must return to the action. It seems Jesse has brought some of Arkansas' finest looking women in for an enticing game of Twister. It must suck not being me! If any of you dimwits want to get ahold of me, e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I get a good chuckle out of reading your moronic comments. Don't forget... you can't write your e-mails in crayon on your monitor. Later fools...